MadaTobi Reincarnation AU Snippets
by Grilled Cheesby
Summary: snippets inspired by my tumblr post: the one where madara is reincarnated as Naruto and tobirama is reincarnated into Sasuke and neither of them are amused.
1. original prompt

**a collection of snippets/ideas from the following ****original idea, taken directly from tumblr:**

the one where madara is reincarnated as Naruto and tobirama is reincarnated into Sasuke and neither of them are amused.

Madara is an uzumaki beast and a jinchuriki and he's gonna be honest, it puts some things in perspective.

Tobirama is an Uchiha and it's gross af but here's his new older brother who is Soft and just wants peace (boi does that sound familiar) and tobirama will fight someone to death for Itachi.

Madara is pissed off when he has to take care of himself, especially since he's always liked kids and the idea of one having to fend for themselves because of the hatred of the village ticks him off.

Tobirama learns Uchiha secrets early on and honestly, he kind of hates to say it, but now he sort of understands why madara went fucking crazy. Besides his Soft brother, the majority of the Uchiha clan is fucking crazy. Constantly condescending is the Uchiha look and quite frankly it only looked good on madara.

Madara runs into an Uchiha child that looks creepily like izuna and is startled by his blank look. Because he's seen that look before. Tobirama!?

Tobirama, who has a sixth sense for madara's brand of bullshit, nopes the fuck outta that situation real quick.

Then cue the canon Naruto trying to get Sasuke's attention and Sasuke ignoring him. Only it's really madara trying to get tobirama to admit who he is and tobirama ignoring the dramatic bitch that was his brother's best friend.


	2. initial reaction

**Anonymous said: **

The Au where Tobirama reincarnates as Sasuke and Madara reincarnates as Naruto sounds interesting. Although I wonder about a few things. How does Tobirama react to the Uchiha massacre? Madara dealing with Pervy Sage and the toads. Madara and Akatsuki trying to kill Naruto. What does this mean for the Indra and Asura stuff. Obito claiming to be Uchiha Madara. How Kurama reacts to meeting the Uchiha who made him into a puppet the first time which is why Jinchuuriki are a thing at all.

**fuckyoucanada** answered:

"Aniki," Tobirama says to Itachi, face blank.

"Yes, otōto?"

"It would be a shame if something were to….happen to the clan. Wouldn't it?"

"I….yes?"

"Just keep that in mind."

—-

"You're a pervert," Madara says numbly, staring at the showboating old man standing before him.

"HA HA HA NO! I'm a super pervert~"

"Kill me," Madara hisses at his stomach, eyeing Jiraiya with dismay. "Nows your chance. Blow me up. Get me away from this—_creature_."

—-

"Uchiha Madara told you to do what now?" Madara asked, scowling at man.

"Collect all of the tailed beasts to usher in a new world peace!"

"But I'm harboring one of those tailed beasts!" Madara whines, ignoring Tobirama as the stoic teen leaps out to take a swipe at their opponent. "I really didn't think this through," he mutters, cut off shouts and the screech of metal on metal echoing around him.

—-

"Come on! You're still holding a grudge?"

**"You enslaved me and took away my free will. The entire reason I've been sealed time after time is because of _you_."**

"Pffffft. Semantics~"

jhaernyl

It cracks me up that Madara knows Sasuke is Tobirama.

Like, how *fast* did these two peg each other down at the Academy?

fuckyoucanada

The fact that there was an Uzumaki running around with a fire chakra affinity was a little weird. Most who remember the Uzumaki know of their proficiency with wind and water jutsu. Still, they chock it up to this being fire country and/or Naruto being affected by the Kyuubi.

The Uchiha that has a water affinity? _That's some supernatural bullshit right there._

"I recognize your pissy expression, Senju! I've been attacked with that water dragon enough times to recognize it you little piss ant!"

"Hn."

"DONT HN ME YOU BASTARD. TOBIRAMA! **TOBIRAMA!**"

**jhaernyl**

I am hopelessly in love with the idea of Tobirama weaponizing the general Uchiha-ness by adding it to his aloof behaviour and then turning it against Madara Uchiha of all people, shoving the whole Uchiha attitude down Madara's throat as a passive-aggressive low key vengeance.

And then Madara also has the fangirls (bc Uchiha and aloof and second in line to clanship) getting in his way, for good measure.

I think Tobirama would weaponize that too, possibly by telling someone, within fangirl hearing, that he was raised to respect and consider strong women equals (which is all true too bc Toka but also means he is steering this young generation towards being strong kunoichis as well as creating a stronger wall between himself and Madara because why only accomplish one thing when you can get three enemies with one jutsu?) so the Tobirama fangirls are also *good kunoichis*.

Madara hates that he is impressed and hates them and hates Tobirama and – etc. etc.

Damn it, now I have ideas XD

**marteshmidgardsormen**

Think of the days where tobirama is just to tiered of all the clans and the fangirl and fanboys, His younger, but unfortunately taller, brother that may currently be under the impression that he's the older sibling. and how he can look at the cliff side and see who he used to be and not want to deal with anything for a while. The forest of death should with all the hashirama tees be a very good spot to hide away for a while.

The forest of death get more and more weird with strange seals popping up all over the place and nobody knows quite what they do?! The ANBU are getting pretty freaked out. One accidentally touched one seal and was only found a week later when she stumbled on a patrol near the land of wave.

Kakashi get pulled into interrogation if he's started to mess around with seal. Who else could it be!? There are no other students of Jiraiya or Namizake left!

Tobirama "sneeking " into a the forest of death. Staring down any unfortunate person that tires to keep him out. And with his sensing he ALWAYS sees them first. But the (most often Uchiha ) Shinobi that follow him to keep an eye on him only sees him venture in until he claims a tree and the he just… leans back and closes his eyes.

The really strange part is when the Uzumaki boy finds him in a tree. Eventually the container also scales the tree (with far to good chakra control for that age!). How they sit on The same branch and just… breath.

"I miss him to."

"You left. He died without you here. Don't you dare claim that you miss him after what you did."

**fuckyoucanada**

*me, screaming into the distance*

"I still get to miss him, asshole," Madara snaps, face flushing from anger. "I was pissed and betrayed but I still cared!"

"You?" Tobirama asks with a deadly calm. "You felt betrayed? What about Hashirama? The friend who always saw the best in you? The man who wanted you to be Hokage? He was your greatest supporter, but you discarded him like yesterday's trash."

"I only did what that damn stone tablet said to do! We were in cycle of failed peace and I just wanted the fighting to stop!" Madara cursed, angry at himself and everyone else who just didn't understand.

Tobirama, instead of yelling at him, pauses. "What stone tablet?"

"Forget it," Madara grunts, standing and turning to leave. "It's not important."

A firm hand grabs his arm before he can leave, the warmth bleeding into his skin. Madara glances behind him, taking in Tobirama.

"Tell me," Tobirama says slowly, his usual coldness gone. "Explain it to me, just once. I'll listen."

With an erie calm developing him, Madara slowly sits down, not bothering to jerk his arm out of the Senju's grip. Instead, he opens his mouth and simply _talks_.

**marteshmidgardsormen**

"Are you serious?"

It's surreal to see a painfully familiar face stare at him in disbelief with a single eyebrow raised. It's almost like looking at Izuna again, back when his brother was alive and happy. However, Madara's brother could never radiate such disappointment and the aura of: _are you really that stupid?! _As well as Tobirama is managing.

Madara want to strangle him, familiar features or not.

"You said you would listen you face stealing deamon."

Tobirama sighs heavily and rolls his eyes. _He rolls his eyes_! Will Madara also begin to develop new and bizarre habits, are their new bodies that influential?

"Did you verify anything in that tablet of yours or did you just take it for the truth? Did you try to find other sources?"

"Of course I did! I did not die for no reason, my strength of will is far…"

"Like a mule"

"No! It manifested as a servant"

"Drugs can cause side effects…"

"_Manifested_ and are still working to further our dream of peace!

Tobirama looked almost sullen as he leaned back against the breath trunk behin him. He looked disturbingly like an Uchiha, it pissed Madara off something immensely. Escpecially as he was not welcome. It grates the long years of isolation, not even the company of Zetsu and the young Uchiha had lessened it.

Madara misses his clan, and the warmth they carried in the chakra. It made the clearly watery tinge to Tobiramas all the more frustrating. Like a wolf in sheep's clothing, ready to pull of its disguise and hunt down his clan. His teeth aches from gritting them too hard.

But the deceiver just sit back against the tree and stares at him.

" I have a question about the logistics of you Etarnal Dream" Tobirama said.

Madara meets his eyes. Grey Uchiha eyes. "What?" Madara has planned it out to perfection. There are no flaws.

Tobirama leaned forward, never breaking the silent stare off they are both committing to, a minuscule smile tugging at the corner of his moth.

"If everyone is dreaming" he said. "How will they eat?"

Madara blinks first.

**fuckyoucanada**

"They will—well obviously—eating is—fuck you, Senju."


	3. Indraasura, how they become team 7

**Anonymous** asked:

In your reincarnation AU what does this mean for the toad prophecyand The Indra and Asura thing? Also how do the teams change? Naruto and Sasuke were on the same team because Naruto was dead last. Also I'm curious as to how Tobirama deals with Uchiha fangirl.

**fuckyoucanada**

Well I mean madara seems like a man that would start a revolution.

As for the Indra/Asura thing. ️

But the whole team thing? Yeah, Madara is so determined to prove That Uchiha Sasuke is Tobirama that he sort of just doesn't pay attention in the academy. Poor grades and shit results in him being on the same team. He didn't join early, so he passes on his first try, but his grades still show him as dead last.


	4. white haired sasuke

**kitsunesongs** asked:

I love your reincarnation AU, but I got to ask - is Sasuke still an albino? And if not, does he bleach his hair white because he's sick of looking in the mirror and seeing Izuna? Also, poor Kakashi in this. Tobirama takes five minutes to get to know this disaster traumatized murder child currently pretending to be an adult and promptly adopts him and starts treating him like one of his students. Kakashi: There's something off about this, but I'm not well-adjusted enough to see what.

** fuckyoucanada**

I would imagine they look like Sasuke and Naruto from canon, but I can totally see tobirama looking at himself in the mirror and just going: I won't stand for this. And then just showing up to dinner one day with white hair and his mother gasping and Itachi worried and fugaku unamused.

And Kakashi is assaulted one day by the white haired Uchiha and is just handed a bento box before the kid just disappears and he doesn't know what happened, but he suddenly remembers he skipped lunch and then just eats it.


	5. MadaTobi giving a damn about kakashi's H

**fangirl39** asked:

In the reincarnation AU is Kakashi still Team 7's teacher? Because if so how does Tobirama feel about the person he basically adopted being his "teacher"?

** fuckyoucanada**

Kakashi is late to everything. It is a known fact at this point that he will be several hours late to any meeting, no matter who it's with and what it's for.

He's on his way to being late right now, walking to spend some time at the Memorial Stone, when Sasuke appears out of nowhere, dyed white hair just suddenly bobbing into existence next to him.

"Kakashi-sensei," he says gravely, like he's carrying horrible news.

"Yes, Sasuke?" Kakashi asks, indulgent. This is the little kid that feeds him, after all. Best to at least pretend to care about his disapproval.

"Naruto spotted you the exact same time I did," Sasuke tells him, causing Kakashi to freeze.

"W-What?" Kakashi stutters, panic seizing him.

"Incoming," Sasuke says with zero sympathy, looking Kakashi dead in the eye with a bland expression.

"HEY! I FOUND YOU, YOU BASTARD! YOU WON'T ESCAPE ME THIS TIME, MUTT!" Naruto's loud voice screamed from somewhere to his left.

Kakashi, who finds himself suddenly sweating profusely, thanks Sasuke from the bottom of his heart and then quickly high tails it out of there, flashes from the last time Naruto caught him before he showed up at their team meeting place playing throughout his mind.

_That kid was far more his mother than his father_, Kakashi thinks with despair, heading in the opposite direction than he had been originally going.

—

"You're pathetic," Madara scoffs lightly, grumbling as he sauntered his way up to Tobirama. "Distracting him from his guilt won't make it go away."

"I don't need it to go away," Tobirama states coolly, turning and walking away with his hands in his pockets. "I just need him to stay away from that stone long enough for him to remember he's still breathing."

Madara scowls at his response, begrudgingly impressed, before he sulkily follows Tobirama to their team training spot. They pick up the pace a bit, basically jogging so they themselves will be on time. The one time they hasn't showed up at the designated hour, Sakura had hit them so hard that Madara swears he could see colors for an hour.

—

Basically he stares at Kakashi, unimpressed, before he goes about recruiting Madara to try and fix Kakashi's survivors guilt.

It's a slow process.


	6. Tobirama reacts to massacre

**Anonymous** asked:

What does TobiSasuke think of his students?

**fuckyoucanada**

Tobirama put _years_ into trying to successfully integrate the damn Uchiha into the village. He gave them a whole damn department just for themselves so they would hold some power. He worked night and day to get the village in a place where civil war was nigh impossible; and then Danzo goes and ruins it and Saru does nothing to stop him.

Homura and Koharu are just as implicit. They are supposed to be Saru's friends, and yet they go behind his back. Tobirama hadn't seen the Uchiha massacre coming. For as intelligent as he is, no one expects such a thing to occur. Tobirama, while stuck in the hospital with a broken arm from a training mishap at the academy, had felt each Uchiha chakra signature flicker out as they died. He couldn't have stopped it even if he wanted to, body so young and chakra still developing, but he mourns his inability to do anything.

He sees the political climate and zeroes onto Danzo and his two wayward students and he burns with shame. He created that attitude in the village. He didn't do enough to create unity. He was the one that stood in silence while Madara screamed at the sky, tears running down his face when news of the massacre finally reached him.

Tobirama will be the one to bring the peace loving Itachi to his knees, using only words of understanding on his lips.

Tobirama isn't ashamed often. When he looks and sees what his actions have wrought for the village and an entire clan, he lowers his head and hides behind his bangs, rare tears prickling at his eyes.


	7. Wave arc, chunin exams, hinata, neji

**Anonymous** asked:

I can't help wonder about the reincarnation AU and the wave arc. And the Chunnin exams. And Hinata. And Neji.

** fuckyoucanada**

So hinata still gets a crush on Naruto, except since madara is so much more aggressive, she becomes less shy and asserts herself more. She forces neji to talk to her and argues with him until they're both blue in the face. Naruto wouldn't take any of the bullshit others spouted off about, so neither will she. She _makes_ neji believe she's going to change the clan. Neji is mostly just overwhelmed.

The wave arc never happens because as soon as they're confronted with the demon brothers, Tobirama nags Kakashi into turning back. His students are the priority he tells him as they return to the village. Kakashi would feel guilty if they got hurt! The man doesn't need any more god damn guilt.

The chunin exams go differently in several different ways. For one, when orochimaru attacks team 7, trying to get to Sasuke, Tobirama manages to keep himself just out of the sannin's reach. Under madatobi's guidance, Sakura is a badass more earlier than before and she is smart enough to signal for some damn help. Orochimaru gets run off before he can place his curse seal on Sasuke.

Madara is still pawned off to jiraiya, much to his displeasure. He becomes so annoyed that he vulantarily talks to the demon fox currently sealed in his stomach. Kurama, who can see that it is madara occupying a different body, is very much not welcoming. Madara spends the majority of his time trying to convince the kyuubi that holding a grudge isn't a smart thing, while simultaneously trying not to combust from the hypocrisy.

He refuses to sign the toad contract. Absolutely not! Madara himself had held a Fox contract, which in itself is ironic, and he refuses to associate with toads anymore than he has to. It's foxes or nothing, he tells jiraiya.

Are you sure that's a smart idea?

Give me fluff, madara replies darkly, or give me death.

—

Tobirama points out to Kakashi that all three of his students have managed to make it to the second round, so he should find accommodations for ALL of them.

So, thoroughly chastised by a white haired brat, Kakashi gets Sakura into the hospital and has her train under several nurses.

You have great chakra control and a medic would be an asset, Kakashi tells her.

I want to punch stuff, Sakura pouts.

Tobirama mentions tsunade and Sakura gets a gleam in her eye before finally agreeing to go to the hospital.

Tobirama goes with Kakashi and sees his chidori at work. Tobirama hasn't woken a sharingan. The reasons why are up for debate. So he has to learn the jutsu the hard way. He likes it that way.

He thinks the technique is interesting enough that he starts to experiment. His element is water, not lightning, but he quickly finds that if he puts enough effort into it, he can keep a semi-constant electrical current running out of his hands. Which means he can touch people and give them a nasty shock. The image of his electrically charged hands combined with a water dragon actually makes him cackle.

Kakashi is mildly concerned.


	8. Hashirama is also reincarnated

**Anonymous** asked:

Is anyone else reincarnated in your MadaTobi au? Like say maybe hashirama as gaara?

** fuckyoucanada**

Anon why would you do this to me.

Kabuto, who is growing more and more suspicious in madara's eyes, whips out another info card, this time showing off a tan red head with a beaming grin.

"This is Sabaku no Gaara," Kabuto tells them, a thoughtful hum in his voice. "He can control sand and… apparently he's known around kaze no kuni for creating oasis's in the desert."

"What?" Sakura asks.

"He can create trees. In the desert," Kabuto answered, seemingly perplexed by his own information. It lends credence to madara's theory that he's a plant for someone, but he's mostly just frozen at the mention of someone managing to make a _tree_.

"A tree?" Tobirama asks, also latching onto that little tidbit.

"It actually sounds kind of like mokuton," Sakura says with a speculative frown.

See, that's what madara's afraid of.

"HA HA HA. I SEE YOUVE BEEN SHARING MY MISSION!"

Madara jerks, shrieking as the boisterous voice yells right into his ear. He is dismayed to find a grinning gaara standing in between him and Kabuto, his attitude making madara feel twitchy.

"I have a dream that one day Kaze no Kuni will be covered with trees! No more sandstorms! Shade for weary travelers! All the wood Sunagakure could get its hands on, no longer being charged outrageous prices!"

Madara blinks at the last point, a little confused, but he doesn't put much effort into understanding what the exact economic status of sunagakure is. Instead, he turns to share a look of unease with Tobirama, who is being uncharacterically quiet about his opinion. Usually he never shuts up about boring things like economics. Clearly he must be thinking the same thing madara is.

Kabuto laughs awkwardly, shuffling away from the four of them after a long silence. Sakura rolls her eyes, glaring at gaara with thinly veiled suspicion, before she flounces off to the other side of the room, her gaze intent on a rather unsuspecting Nara.

"Hashirama!?" Tobirama hisses, just managing to keep his voice low enough that only madara can here.

"Shhh! I don't want him to know who we are!" Madara grimaces at the other boy, nose wrinkled as a blinding grin finds its way onto gaara's hashirama's face.

"It can not be!" Hashirama bellows in a loud whisper, his voice carrying across the room, attracting attention from the other assembled participants. "my dearest brother! You've returned to me!¡!" With that said, he opens his arms wide, practically flinging himself at Tobirama's disgruntled form.

Madara, who has somehow managed to not implicate himself as, well, _himself_, quickly vacates his previous spot, leaving Tobirama to his doom.

"Anija—stop! _**STOP!**_"


	9. tazuna lives

**Anonymous asked:**

Does that mean the bridge builder dies in the Reincarnation AU?

** fuckyoucanada**

Nah. Since they go back to konoha, they take him with them to face the Hokage. He explains and when he does, it's agreed that konoha will send higher ranked shinobi for the same price as long as they get a discount on any future trades.

So when there's a rare medical plant found growing in abundance on a forgotten shore? Well, Sakura calls dibs.


	10. hashirama and shukaku interlude

**fangirl39 asked:**

Hashirama and the Biju he has to now deal with

** fuckyoucanada**

Once Hashirama realizes he has a biju, he's delighted. He smiles at the shrieking shukaku from the day he's reborn.

"It's very nice to meet you, my friend!"

**"ILL TEAR YOU STOMACH OPEN AND FEAST ON YOUR GUTS**."

"Oh! You're saying that you wish you could help me deal with my stomach ache? That's very kind of you, Shu-chan!"

And he just won't stop. He just does things to shukaku all the time. His will is iron clad so he gets plenty of sleep and he regularly meditates to have hour long conversations at his biju.

Shukaku, after dealing with it for over a decade, is just exhausted. He can no longer handle a constant bloodthirsty rage like he used to. He finds himself bewildered and slightly afraid of the grinning founder of konoha.

And when rasa sends someone to attack gaara to test his restraint? Shukaku shows the first signs of caring. He lets Hashirama take some chakra without even fighting him, not even bothering to try and get the man to kill his would be attacker.

He doesn't like that he cares, but at this point he dares any of his siblings to deal with Senju Hashirama as a container and not just give in to his overtures of friendship.


	11. orochimaru and sasuke's boring rant

**6miray6 asked:**

The Fourth Shinobi World wants to "help" Sasuke and he resurrects all Kage. Tobirama/Sasuke never asked for it! Orochimaru begins his great speech about Naidame's plans to destroy the Uchiha... And Madara/Naruto... What will the Madara/Naruto reaction be?

** fuckyoucanada**

Orochimaru is utterly baffled when he goes to resurrect the Hokage and only the fourth's coffin starts to open. The first and second coffins stay closed without any interference and sarutobi is still alive and kicking, so now he only has the yondaime at his disposal.

Disgruntled, he tries to convince the young Uchiha that the village had been out to get the Uchiha the entire time, ignoring Naruto's "I knew it!" With a straight face.

The words "the nidaime wanted the Uchiha dead" triggers the fuck out of Sasuke and when orochimaru grins, thinking that he has him, the Uchiha instead scream, an uncharacteristic red flush from anger finding its way on his face.

For the next forty minutes, the whole battlefield is regaled with every policy the nidaime ever put in place, as well as the intentions that were meant behind the gestures.

The uzumaki, who rolls his eyes at several points through his companions long speech, just simply smirks at orochimaru.

"This shit is boring. Eat dirt!" Sakura shouts, successfuly taking orochimaru off guard and punching him into a mountain.

It cuts Sasukes speech off, leaving him sweaty and enraged. "Why do people keep saying that!?"

—

Madara is mad at first, dimly smug at being proven right, but then Tobirama starts going off about his policies and actions and he can feel exasperated affection lodge itself in his chest, so he just listens and slowly lets his hatred go.

He does cackle when Sakura attacks the snake sannin. She's surpassed tsunade at this point and it's always a delight to see someone you've invested training in become strong.


	12. Beyoncé?

**fangirl39** asked:

How does Hashirama react when the Chunnin exams are over and he has to leave? Also does he find out about Madara?

**fuckyoucanada**

I imagine he cries about it because he's Hashirama. Clings yo Tobirama something fierce, promising to write him a letter every. single. day.

Tobirama is exhausted, rolling his eyes at his theatrics. He and madara still are Hashirama off, though madara has managed to hide his true identity.

"I'll miss you Tobi!" Hashirama shouts as he frantically waved goodbye as he and the other suna nin depart.

"Are u saying you won't miss madara?" Tobirama asks, because there is no way he's letting that bastard stay hidden.

Insert Hashirama being like that one gif where he's like "Beyoncé!?" But "Madara!?" And then he disappears into the distance, being dragged along by temari. Madara glares at Tobirama, scowling heavily. "You dick"


	13. kill him

**fangirl39** asked:

The raccoon is weak. Hashirama is 1/3 of the reason the Biju are slaves.

**fuckyoucanada**

"U can't be real" shukaku stutters, so _tired_.

"Are U saying I'm a dream?" Hashirama beams up at him.

"Kill me" shukaku Cries.


	14. tsunade

**Anonymous** asked:

Hashirama is a dream in the way a nightmare is technically a dream. Also what do the ex-Senju think of Tsunade?

**fuckyoucanada**

Hashirama is obviously rather taken with his granddaughter. When tsunade takes the job of Hokage, she is in no way prepared for the amount of messages that come from the newly named kazekage. He is a _nuisance_. He doesn't seem to be flirting, which just weirds her out more. She doesn't know what he wants. All he does is ask after her health and suggest she watch after uzumaki and Uchiha, which just leaves her more confused.

—

Tobirama is not amused by her vices and he recruits a bored madara to help him hide her alcohol. They find really weird places to hide them: they manage to convince gai that keeping one of the sake bottles hidden is a challenge from Kakashi, they bet anko that she can't find a place on her person to hide a bottle (she can, madara is terrified), and then they just leave them in odd spots, like in trees.

Tobirama takes to lecturing her about gambling, a bored madara flipping through a magazine as Tobirama drones on.

—

Tsunade is livid and she regularly tries to strangle team 7 when she sees them, though she begrudgingly takes Sakura on as a student after Naruto offers her back a bottle that's half full. No one else will sell her any alcohol, so now she's being bribed by a bunch of genin.

"Who are you to tell me how to act, Uchiha?" Tsunade grits out, incensed at the little brat's attitude.

"He's channeling your ancestors in your time of need," the other brat chimes in, his nose stuck in one of his stupid magazines.

Tsunade stares at him, anger rising as the Uchiha nods, like they're being _serious_.

"Think of me as Tobirama," the Uchiha says, face just as blank as his supposed namesake.

"I should never have taken the hat," tsunade says in disbelief, lost as she is stuck being lectured by an Uchiha pretending to be a Senju and a lazy, do nothing loudmouth with anger issues.

"Who are you calling a loudmouth!?" Naruto shouts, finally putting down his magazine.

"_That's_ what he chooses to complain about?" Sasuke mutters next to her, his eyes rolling.

"I'm not loud!" The blonde shouts, being loud.

The white haired Uchiha ignores him, turning back to tsunade and once more droning On about responsibilities and other nonsense.

"I should have told sensei to stuff it," tsunade grumbles, her forehead cracking against her desk as she falls forward, groaning.


	15. Akatsuki

**Anonymous** asked:

What does Hashirama think of Akatsuki and he's 1/3 of the reason jinchuuriki are being murdered? Also does he die?

**fuckyoucanada**

hashirama has one of his more serious moments when he learns of the akatsuki. by this point, shukaku mostly just does what hashirama wants, if only to end the nagging and tears. shukaku is able to talk to his siblings and warn them about the threat they're under. hashirama appreciates the dream of peace, but using the tailed beasts like he did in the past wasnt the answer. they had feelings and opinions and treating them like unfeeling monsters is one of the things that got him into this situation. he doesnt die, nor is shukaku extracted from him. they work together as a team and they have reinforcements from konoha at the time of the attack. tobirama and he are used to teaming up and kicking ass, and now that theyre in more mature bodies, it;s a lot easier to execute moves they used to do all the time. madara and sakura defeat sasori, though they dont kill him. instead, they seal his chakra and then hand him over to chiyo and they let her and suna deal with him. deidara escapes with a missing arm and a new intense fear of electrified water dragons.


	16. Konoha 12

**Anonymous** asked:

Hym. What about the rest of Konoha 12? Is Tobirama trying to mentor them? Did Shikamaru guess something was definitely wrong with his colleagues?

**fuckyoucanada**

I already mentioned hinata and neji, so here's the others:

Kiba: Naruto and Sasuek smell weird to him and he tends to suspiciously watch them whenever they get near him. Yeah everybody has their own unique scents and stuff but they smell like the dust from the really old scrolls his mother wont ever let him touch, and he always sneezes when hes around them for too long.

theyre pretty alright besides that. naruto always pets akamaru whenever he sees him and kiba once caught sasuke slipping akamaru some of the high quality beef jerky.

shino: his bugs tend to not like going towards team 7. naruto has chakra more like fire than any other konoha nin shino has faced and sasuke's ability to pull water jutsus out of his ass is concerning to a bug user who doesnt want his bugs to drown without warning. he otherwise has no problem with them; tobirama once showed him a rare breeding ground for a bug shino's clan thought extinct and shino has seen Madara take a spider outside rather than stepping on them.

ino: she had a crush on sasuke back in the academy, but after her falling out with sakura, sasuke told her that she shouldnt pick a boy over a best friend. then he mentioned that if he ever did want to date a girl, they would have to be strong and be able to show that they held strong bonds with their comrades. while ino made up with sakura because of what he said, she lost her crush soon after when she saw how naruto got a bigger reaction out of sasuke then anyone she had ever seen. quite clearly the boys were lost on each other and she might be pigheaded, but she also knew when to throw in the towel. she regularly has lovely chats with naruto that involve the language of flowers and their history, oddly enough, in the uchiha clan.

choji: a lot of kids made fun of choji's size and when he was younger he really only had shikamaru to rely on to defend him. that is, until naruto hears a couple of newly minted genin picking on him. the blonde eviscerated them with his words, his shouting the loudest thing choji had ever heard. when choji asked him why he defended him naruto had simply said "we all carry fire inside us; we should be fanning it, not trying to extinguish the flame." ever since then, when people called naruto an idiot, choji made a point to disagree. he might be loud and a bit scatter brained, but naruto was in no way dumb.

shikamaru: naruto and sasuke arent who they pretend to be. shikamaru could go on about the details sasuke shared about the warring states era that he had no way of knowing, or naruto's proficiency at uchiha clan jutsu that even sasuke couldnt do, but it would be too troublesome to bother. besides, the one time he voiced his suspicions of the two, an irate sakura cornered him the next day and threatened to wedgie him into nonexistance if he didn't leave her teammates alone. women were dangerous and shikamaru wouldnt dare mess with them.

tenten: she actually doesnt have a lot of interaction with team 7, but she has seen the positive effect naruto's loud speech had on neji. she sees how neji becomes less sharp, more caring, after naruto tells him that life might now be fair, that the generations before us might have failed, but thats no excuse for us to fail as well. the circle of hatred needed to end; let neji letting go of his own vendetta be the start of a new wheel. she appreciates the change in her teammate and whenever naruto comes into her father's weapon shop and shes working, she always gives him a discount.

lee: lee feels different from the others. he tries not to let his inability to use chakra like the others affect him, but hes young and still trying to find himself. after the chunin exams, everyone is a lot nicer to him, they show their appreciation for the amount of work he puts in. he is approached one day by a neutral faced sasuke who asks to observe his workout routine. what was originally a one week endeavor turns into an every morning thing where sasuke will show up at the training grounds and idly chat to lee as he stretches and practices his katas. the uchiha will occasionally watch him before writing something down. he'll stay and keep lee company until gai-sensei shows up and sasuke has to leave to meet his own team. it makes lee smile.

its not so much mentor them as show them that they have the potential to be so much more than the previous generation. they cant let the past get in the way of their own progress. tobirama is sort of hesitant to really try to mentor anyone after the way his own students turned out. madara thinks hes being stupid, he cant blame himself for the decisions adults make long after he was dead, but tobirama doesnt ever listen to him, so instead he tries and facilitates friendships between tobirama and their graduating class. he doesnt let the younger nin get lost in his own head.


	17. Uchiha Massacre pt II

**6miray6** asked:

I look forward to confronting with Danzo. Who kill him? Will Danzo die the same as he die in canon?. Om maybe Tobirama and Madara reveal all his secrets much earlier. I wish the bastard would die knowing who Sasuke really is. Let him die and know that Tobirama-sensei loathes him. Heck. Hiruzen should know too./Now I imagine how mini Sasuke finds out about Danzo's plans. He goes to Naruto for help. They unmask Danzo and Root and save Uchiha.

**fuckyoucanada**

so, i dont know if i mentioned it in a previous ask, but the uchiha massacre still happens. tobirama is help up at the hospital after an accident at the academy itachi and obito go through with it. besides, even if he's stronger than a lot of thothers, his body isnt that of a fully trained nin; he's a child who up to that point, had been rather sheltered by his parents. he doesnt have the stamina, even if he does have the chakra/control. so the uchiha all die and tobirama has to be the one to tell madara that his clan has been massacred. and tobirama hates it but he cries too because it wasnt only madara's clan. not anymore. he knew those people. they smiled at him, they gave him treats, they were people just trying to live their lives.

tobirama isnt actually (however many) years old and he can tell something isnt right. he knows itachi and while trauma can change people, that doesnt feel like what just happened. something smells foul and tobirama will do his best to find out what it is.

(it takes a decade for him to get his first clue in the form of a falsely smiling shinobi named sai who tsunade informs them is going to be joining them on their diplomatic trip to suna. he takes one look at that seal and the memories from that night return to him. once he talks with kakashi and tsunade, he makes the connection to danzo and ROOT; and he is so disappointed and ashamed.)


	18. Zabuza

**Merllis** commented:

Oh my god these drabbles/fic/ideas are fantastic! What I want to know is how Tobirama reacts to Zabuza, like dude parades himself as a water Jutsu user savant with his mist shit and tries to drown Kakashi in some water cage (or at least that's what my goldfish memory recalls), surely Tobirama wouldn't stand for that? Thanks for writing these, this fic is marvellous :)

**BoyGirlBothNoneImTheUniverse**

well they actually never make it to meeting zabuza and haku cuz tovirama tells kakashi it would be stupid to continue the mission with three genin because obviously after the demon brothers their client lied to them.

buuuuut that doesnt mean they dont run into zabuza ever now does it.

since tobirama isnt sasuke and he never leaves the village, there is years worth of mission where they can run into zbuza. and since its tobirama and madara, they pass as chunin the firs ttime around. sakura does to because they actually CARE and they TRAIN her. so you have team kakashi, out on a mission, when they run into zabuza and haku.

kakashi warns them away, because even if theyre chunin, theyre not ready for zabuza. except he gets caught in the water ball and now his students are vulnerable.

haku pulls out the ice mirrors and sakura faces off agaisnt him because to be frank, she could punch every mirror into tiny pieces. haku is surprised and slightly impressed.

tobirama fight water with water, only his has electricity. he is able to shock zabuza in a surprise attack, allowing madra to throw some kunai and get him to disengage with the waterball of drowning. kakashi is out, zabuza and haku retreat after kakashi reveals his sharingan and nobody died.


End file.
